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Suicide and Ropes

I had been drawn to a discussion stream on the Linkedin Website under the Spirituality and Consciousness group heading. The discussion had to do with suicide. A member had experienced having a brother who committed suicide and wished to talk about it with others because she still carried pain and depression from what had happened. She wanted to know if souls come into the world intending to commit suicide, and if they don’t, do they have to return quickly to work out what they failed to do. A deeper reason may well have been that she carried sadness, depression and many questions about the suicide. Many supported the questioner with empathy and sympathy, and some provided their spiritual understandings regarding our souls’  journeys. One comment addressed the Buddhist philosophy of the Middle Way, in which life is lived with non-attachment, non-judgment. Even knowing this Way, it is possible to slip, as the next respondent stated and feel “terrible, in a crisis or drama of some sort.” I noticed that many respondents commented about mind as a single entity. But my experience is that we do not just have one mind.


We have two major organizational minds. The mind we are most familiar with is the one directed by our thoughts and the other mind that controls us more than we care to believe, yet know very little about, is directed by our feelings. When our thoughts have become possessed by dark and heavy thought-patterns like judgment, criticism, guilt, shame, bitterness, revenge and more, we are able to experience profound shifts to higher vibrational thoughts by providing correct, true, authentic thoughts. This can take us back to experiencing our world with curiosity, interest, amazement, and wonder and experiencing our being from a place of peace, joy, and love. Eastern religious perspectives are experts in being able to support practitioners in returning to these experiences.


When the same dark thought-patterns keep coming back that disturb our experience of peace, joy, and love, and seem to respond to the higher truth we provide for only limited time periods or not at all, there is a deeper, unconscious mind, not often addressed in many cultures or religious systems, which is the source of the disturbance. And this is the mind of feelings, which is related to but not the same as emotions. When feelings are not acknowledged and addressed, or when they are acknowledged and dealt with by thought solutions only, they may be suppressed for a while, but they persist. When something in our current life reactivates the darker thoughts from the past, we lose connection with truth and with our true selves. The Chinese have a saying: Once frightened by a snake, a thousand times frightened by a rope.


Feelings are not wrong; they are not good or bad. They are messages sent to our conscious mind from deeper places within, to let us know our body is responding to something it experiences. At some point in our past, something caused thoughts and feelings to join together to create emotions and thought conclusions about us and about our world.  These conclusions from long ago create our experience and our behaviors today. These are deeply embedded patterned responses, when growing from misconceptions have the capability of destroying curiosity, interest, amazement, and wonder and separating us from experiencing authentic life.


When someone we know dies or leaves our lives unexpectedly, our body experiences the sudden loss of the energy field of the other. If we experienced a close attachment or connection to the other, our energy lines flowed into theirs and theirs flowed into ours—whether in a healthy way or an unhealthy one—so the sudden exit of the other causes our field to go into shock with the loss. This happens because the extension of our energy field into the other’s energy field immediately experiences contraction. The abrupt shift from extension to contraction can be painful. Our energy may go down many paths in response to the loss, including denial of the loss, getting trapped in obsessive reviewing of the loss to see if there might have been a way to have prevented it, frantically searching for what was lost, as in longing for the other and desperately searching for what is not there, or seeking to reattach to something or someone to ease the shock of the sudden loss.


If both our thoughts and our feelings were attached or connected to the one who leaves us, and when providing truthful thoughts of higher mind do not fully dissolve old dark patterned thoughts and emotions, we need to address the feeling mind.


By addressing the unconscious deeper mind of feelings, we go to the original cause of the pattern that is composed of several components: an external experience (the snake coiled and hissing along a nature trail), the internal feeling (the physical shock or pain experienced when expansion of enjoyment of nature suddenly turns into abrupt contraction), the thought (my life is in danger), glued together by the emotion, (fear of dying). This bundled response of terror explodes into experience every time the metaphoric rope shows itself.


The deepest truth is anything that enters our lives is a gift that can teach us something, guide us, remind us, protect us, enrich our life experience, and return us to experiencing life from a place of curiosity, interest, amazement, and wonder and experiencing our being from a place of peace, joy, and love. Even a coiled snake or the suicide of someone we love is such a gift, if we are willing to receive it. What enters our lives or crosses our path is not our source of peace, joy, love, happiness, or success and does not provide us with our life. And, what crosses our path or enters our lives does not cause our disturbance, suffering, fear, sadness, or failure and does not bring on our death. Spirit, Universal-God-Essence, is our source…and the source is in us as the spark of God that is our Unique God Essence.


We can live in our Unique-God-Essence, in alignment with Universal-God Essence, our spirit aligned with Spirit, experiencing all the gifts of life and what they have come to give us or we can live out of alignment and believe what crosses our path is our source of what we call good and bad. For most, this is experienced as bad because being out of alignment with our true source has a tendency to draw us into the darker energies.


I believe that there are a growing number of people who are coming to understand the spirit within and are seeking alignment with Spirit, the God Essence of the Universe. Yet, many of us go through times of misalignment. Just as the universe is One, made up of many, and human consciousness is One, made up of many, so too, each of us is one, made up of many. While most aspects of us may well have embraced the understanding that we are spiritual beings having a spiritual experience and are aligned with the union of Unique/Universal God Essence, parts of us might be stuck in past life experiences, suppressed childhood experiences, genetic patterns, and life events that keep us from knowing the union. From my own internal work and the work with thousands of clients over the years, I am convinced that we create experiences in our lives to support us in reconnecting with the separated and lost parts of ourselves that have become caught in the thought-feeling-belief-behavior pattern bundles, which all too often take over our lives.

Healing requires re-entering the bundle complex and bringing love and truth to that part of us that experiences life as separate and bring to that part the truth of our connection…allowing us to experience ourselves more and more, as One. When the part of us that has been trapped in the bundle experiences love and truth, the old pattern this part exhibited in our life melts away and the heavy energy dissolves into light energy. As one person becomes more connected to his or her own oneness, human consciousness, which is also a part of Universal Oneness becomes more aware of that Oneness. After all, we are all connected.

Written by sandy